It is Saturday the 9th of June 2012, and my beard is in need of trimming.
I scaled it back to a cool & fashionable 0.5mm using my Babyliss 7855U I-Trim Stubble All Over Hair and Beard Trimmer on Thursday, but it's become coarse & unruly in the intervening days. It is fast approaching the length of Jonny Vegas's, and may even be over the dreaded 1mm mark!
However, there's a problem. I've just taken my beard trimmer from its dedicated drawer (in which it is kept in cool and dry conditions), plugged it in and hit on.
But nothing has happened! There's no illuminated LCD screen wishing me a comfortable shave, no whirring blades vibrating back and forth notifying me we're good to go and no shout from my housemate James telling me to make sure I clean the sink when I'm done.
Instead, I am met with a painful and harrowing dull silence. My beard trimmer has died.
Better get on to Babyliss to sort this out.